How do I help somebody that asks me how to fix a PC with a virus?

"Be honest, just tell them ""I don't know, I use a Mac""

then look at them with fond pity until they slink away

Addendum: your question asked for some software or something to help them, but you really shouldn't - otherwise their problems will become your problems, i.e. ""That software you recommended didn't work, now what should I do?"". Better not to get involved. Think of it as ""tough love"" ;-)"

"Be honest and tell them,

""that whilst you are confident with computers, you are not an expert when it comes to PC's. As the machine has a virus the only thing you can recommend is that the wipe everything and restart from scratch. Other than that they might get better help with someone who lives eats and breathes PC's.""

That should do it.

or

Tell them to go to the buymore, and the nerd herd desk and ask for Chuck."

"I love how some people have immediately tried to turn this into a Mac v PC thing.

Back to reality, why not just tell them you're a software developer, not a computer support technician.

As an analogy you could say: ""Asking me to fix a computer is like asking a writer of a novel to fix a printing press"".

I find it amusing how many developers think technical support work is so easy that anyone could do it.

They want everyone to bow down to their mastery of everything computer related, but when it comes to proving it, it's all too hard.

From direct experience, most developers are useless technical support people and give good support people a bad name."
"I love how some people have immediately tried to turn this into a Mac v PC thing.

Back to reality, why not just tell them you're a software developer, not a computer support technician.

As an analogy you could say: ""Asking me to fix a computer is like asking a writer of a novel to fix a printing press"".

I find it amusing how many developers think technical support work is so easy that anyone could do it.

They want everyone to bow down to their mastery of everything computer related, but when it comes to proving it, it's all too hard.

From direct experience, most developers are useless technical support people and give good support people a bad name."

"When they ask if you can fix their computers.

Say ""No, but if you find someone who can, will you let me know""."

"A quick way of making people stop asking you for free IT helpdesk is by making them think twice before asking you again.

Everyone has their favorite way of going about this, but I will leave here the easiest example of all: adult material related embarrassement:

tell them how you have to delete all of their pr0n to make the virus go away..

If they ask ""what pr0n?"" smile and
slowly follow the steps to open
IE/Firefox history folder

Better yet, give details on how ""once"" you found some really weird stuff on one of your friend's machine (murmuring clown midgets in good timing helps) you can also add that most people don't even know they have that kind of stuff until you go fix it..
Help them once and leave with the warning that its the adult content websites that spread the viruses online.

All of the above examples worked with people I know.. (Worked on my machineTM variant)

The topic could be something more family-show friendly also.. but shock and awe is the best approach here.

Try it"